Chazography

It’s been a while since this page has seen a refresh, but I’ve decided it’s about time to change that. Fortunately, this past weekend alone I saw three different movies (well, amost three movies at least) which provide ample fodder. So for those who are a little slower on the uptake, this post is going to be about "Movies, movies, movies."

The first film to be graced by my keen insight and brilliant critical analysis will be A Prairie Home Companion. This wonderful "gem" of a movie is stacked with a star-studded cast including such names as Woody Harrelson, Tommy Lee Jones, Kevin Kline, Lindsay Lohan, Maya Rudolph, and Meryl Streep. It’s just unfortunate that the producers of this movie forgot to obtain a decent screenplay to showcase the talents of their all-star cast, and consequently, this movie failed to interest me at all. In fact, I was so thoroughly bored and disinterested with this movie that I actually walked out about thirty or forty-five minutes into the story; it was just that bad. The story (so far as I could tell) revolved around a live radio show that called the Fitzgerald, a small-town theatre, home. All of this information along with the fact that the theatre would be performing its last live broadcast before closing down is disclosed in the film’s opening narration. However, you’d be hard-pressed to learn much more than that from the characters ambiguous, nonsensical babble, and I found myself thoroughly confused and bored by a lack of plot development. To all those thinking about seeing this film, I’d highly advise against it, but what do I know?

After sitting through the excruciatingly painful thirty or forty-five minutes of A Prairie Home Companion, I decided leave and go see Pixar’s latest animated film Cars. I have to be honest that when I first saw previews for Cars I wasn’t very excited about it, and I actually wasn’t planning on seeing it. If it weren’t for my father recommending it and being completely un-entertained by A Prairie Home Companion, I very well might have skipped it, but I’m definitely glad I didn’t. Pixar did a wonderful job developing the cars as interesting characters that the audience could truly relate to. The cars had wonderful animation that seemed to bring them to life, and I really that I forgot they were simply inanimate objects. The story revolves around one car’s, Lightning McQueen, journey towards becoming the next big thing in the world of racing. Though brimming with talent and potential Lightning still has a lot to learn about racing as he still doesn’t understand that racing is a team sport; rather, Lightning believes everything revolves solely around him. In fact, it is hubris that costs him an easy win in a big race resulting in a three-way tie with both his nemesis and the reigning champ. The remainder of the movie revolves around Lightning learning that there’s more to life than just himself or winning as he interacts with other cars in the quaint little town of Radiator Springs. If you’re looking for an entertaining movie and you enjoy animated flicks, I wholeheartedly recommend this movie.

Finally, I saw The Omen which is a remake of the 1976 cult classic. I never saw the original so the story was completely new to me, but from what I have been told, this new rendition is a very faithful (almost scene by scene) transcription of the original. Just like the exorcist, I did not find this movie all that terrifying even though it was considered to be quite frightening upon its original release, but I must confess that the little kid who played the son of satan did creep me out. For those who are unfamiliar with the basic plot of the movie, a couple has a child who is born on 06-06-2006, and the father is told by a priest that his child died during delivery. The crafty priest is able to hoodwink him into believing that his wife suffered severe trauma to her uterus and would be unable to conceive another child. There is another child, however, who’s mother died while giving birth, and the priest tells the man that he should take that child and tell his wife that it is their own to spare her the heartbreak of giving birth to a stillborn baby. What the man doesn’t realize is that all of this is a ruse. His child was killed, and this other child, the son of Lucipher, was born unto a goat (since it apparently states in the Bible that the son of satan will be born unto a goat). The rest of the movie consists of this father being warned by several figures that his child is evil and that he must kill him. It is not until his wife dies and he sees that his son has a birthmark in the formm of 666 on the back of his head that he truly believes the admonitions he has received. He then proceeds to try and kill his son in the manner that he was instructed by a knowledgeable priest, but he is killed in the process and satan’s son is spared. This of course leaves room for the sequels which followed the original–whether or not those will receive remakes is unknown to me. Overall I found the movie mildly entertaining; it’s not a must see, but I wouldn’t advise against it either. If you’re on the fence about this one, you might as well wait for it to become available as a rental. Well, there you have it. Three incredibly wonderful reviews that you probably couldn’t do without. Tune in for the next installment in my entertaining world tomorrow. It will be marked by an early trip to the gym, work, a trip to the dentist, and one final trip to the gym. Wow, I can’t believe how excited I am for tomorrow already! Let me go ahead and express my jubilation with a barrage of words expressing my elation and delight: wooooohoooo, yiiippppeeeeee, woooowwwzzeerrrssss, teeerrrrriifffic, g-r-r-r-r-eaaaaat!

Ever since heading off to school, I haven’t been a frequent moviegoer, but this weekend I actually managed to make it to two! Much to my chagrin, both of them were excellent! I’ll start first with Thank You For Smoking.

I didn’t know quite what to expect when I went to this movie, but I was definitely pleasantly surprised. The “protagonist” (Nick Naylor) is the lead spokesman for “Big Tobacco”. He is the “Sultan of Spin”. The king of bullshit. In short, he is the ultimate politician. Of course, I guess one would have to be incredibly good at circular rhetoric and speaking out one’s arse in order to lead a public relations campaign for an industry whose product is a direct cause of lung cancer. How do you defend a product whose prolonged use may lead to the customer’s ultimate demise? An even better question is, “How do you spin for a ‘Big Tobacco’ while still remaining a role model to your 12-yr old son?” You’ll just have to see the movie to find out. However, I will give you a nice slice of dialoge to whet your whistle…

Jeff Megall: Sony has a futuristic sci-fi movie they’re looking to make.
Nick Naylor: Cigarettes in space?
Jeff Megall: It’s the final frontier, Nick.
Nick Naylor: But wouldn’t they blow up in an all oxygen environment?
Jeff Megall: Probably. But it’s an easy fix. One line of dialogue. ‘Thank God we invented the… you know, whatever device.’

The second movie seen this weekend is Failure To Launch. I wasn’t expecting to like this movie so much, but given I don’t mind chick flicks, I figured it couldn’t be too bad. Yes, I know. I’m a dude, and I like chick flicks! However, I’ve admitted it, and that is the first step towards recovery.

As it turns out, I really enjoyed this movie. The characters were memorable and funny, and I found myself constantly engrossed in the plot (even if it is rather light-hearted and stupid). For those who don’t know, the movie is about male in his thirties who still lives at home and his parents’ attempt to get him to spread his wings and move out. To facilitate his move out of the nest, they hire a woman who specializes in getting older men who still live at home to move out by pretending to date them. Whether it was the main character’s father turning his son’s old room into a “naked room” or the protagonist himself getting bitten by a handful of peaceful woodland creatures, I found myself constantly laughing. I must warn that bird lovers and those still living at home may find this movie to be somewhat disturbing, but as for the rest of you, I don’t think you’ll regret going to see this movie.

To those looking for movies, each of these movies gets my personal seal of approval. Too bad I don’t have an official seal of approval just yet.